I Want To Attend Gay Shame

Note: this is a guest post by a good friend of mine, Jules Vasquez, a non-binary member of the LGBTQ community. It should go without saying (but just in case some of the light-switch brains are reading this) we don’t agree upon everything; but one thing we do agree upon is that we don’t like our corporate overlords, and we want to see more organic communities and small businesses out there. Even if this subject matter doesn’t seem to interest my regular audience, I believe you might just get something out of it.

Leo

The community will fight me over the title of this article, but it’s not intended as an insult; bear with me, we’ve got a lot of ground to cover. Let’s start out with something flamboyant and attention getting:

Pride Month is tiring, nauseating, and depressing.

There, a queer said it.

It’s no accident that LGBTQ+ celebrities decide to come out or drop controversial content in spring… looking at you, Lil Nas X, you fabulous little consumerist bastard, you.  Tell me: why exactly is your music video – the one where you give the Devil a lap dance – so incredibly newsworthy? It’s not like Satanic imagery is something new. That shtick’s been old-hat since the Boomers rocked out to it in the 1960s.

The only thing shocking about this is how well Nas X’s viral marketing worked.

The scheme started with Nas X’s shoes, which are controversy embodied. The overpriced, limited edition “Satan Shoes”, which feature “Satanic” imagery, and allegedly contained a drop of human blood. Look out, you might cut yourself on the edginess!

So far this is just trash culture for trash people; but Nas X was playing another angle.

His “Satan Shoes” ripped-off another bit of trash culture, “Jesus Shoes” (they allegedly contain a drop of water from the River Jordan) – including the Nike logo. Because of this, Nike successfully sued X’s company, and now the “Satan Shoes” will not be produced. But it was never about selling shoes in the first place. It was about marketing his name and his controversial music video. And it worked.

Nas X is a guerilla marketer. He claimed the Satanic lap dance video was about coming out of the closet – which he did years ago. He used his status as a celebrity LGBTQ+ musician to get MONTERO nominated for an MTV award, and the Satan Shoe controversy to make himself a household name. The whole situation was an ingenious mix of pseudo gay rights advocacy and multi-million dollar marketing. For a few weeks there, Nas X had the world on a string.

But hey, he’s a celebrity; that’s his job. I’m not overly worried by the antics of one guy. But it’s an example of how fake-advocacy can be a great marketing ploy, and it helps illustrate my contention that Pride Month, in its current form, is a nightmare – and maybe even a threat to the community.

It’s not that I’m not proud of my orientation… no, hold that, maybe “proud” is the wrong word. I’m unashamed. I’m unashamed of my sexual orientation and identity.

What I’m proud of is the obstacles I’ve overcome. Sometimes, these obstacles took the form of discrimination from others. Other obstacles were the courage it took to come out. These are things I’m proud of.

I’m also proud of others; the queers and allies who fought for my rights. With it comes humility; I offer them my humble gratitude.

In that respect, I’m both proud and humble. Yet, I still dread this thing called “Pride” every June. At times it makes me feel outright ashamed. Not ashamed of the weirdos in attendance (love you guys!) but of the corporate sponsors who are piggy-backing of our hard-won rights.  

Let’s start with the swag. Every June, Pride Merchandise parades along not only kitschy farmers markets, grungy art collectives, punk shops, underground warehouse shows, LGBTQ centres, Etsy shops, and tattoo parlors, where it ought be – we endure it everywhere. Walmart, Target, JoAnns, the local supermarket, the corner store… everywhere!

Even after moving to a conservative region (where few Pride events even occur!), Pride merch clutters the aisles throughout June…

Say: have you ever wondered why Pride is celebrated in June?

There’s the historical relevance of the Stonewall riot, an event at one of New York’s infamous underground gay bars. Back then, gay bars were illegal, even in New York.

On June 28^th 1969, over 200 patrons packed the Stonewall Inn to mourn the death of Judy Garland, who had died earlier that week. Two female and two male undercover police officers were in attendance. It was custom to ask for a payoff to ignore the homosexual clientele, but that night they hadn’t received it, so they raided the Inn. (Fun fact: the Mafia ran gay bars in 1969 – blame it on the Italians). As you can probably guess, things didn’t go as planned.

Bar attendees were asked to show their IDs. Meanwhile, alcohol was seized. Police targeted and arrested cross dressers, the crowd resisted, the cops got rougher, the crowd started breaking loose, and then the police charged. Furniture, alcohol, and the building were damaged, everyone not handcuffed ran outside. The crowd outside grew larger as passerbys started to join the riot. Soon, more than 600 people were street battling the police. Police reinforcements arrived to a full riot, which wasn’t cleared until four am. Thirteen people were arrested, a few were injured, nobody died. It’s one of the first protests where LGBTQ folks took direct action against the system. The second night of the riot, thousands participated in a mass demonstration in front of the bar, Marsha P. Johnson threw the infamous brick. Four more nights of violent protests followed.

That’s why Pride’s in June.. but it’s not the main reason.

Stonewall is worth commemorating; but why isn’t Pride just Stonewall Week? Why don’t Pride events occur on the 28^th  to July 3^rd, culminating in the 4^th? That sounds downright patriotic.

Or how about November 27^th? On that date in 1978, Dan White assassinated San Francisco Mayor George Moscone and gay politician Harvey Milk over political rivalries. Milk’s funeral march became a Pride March. The number of participants exceeded those in the Stonewall Uprising. So why don’t we celebrate on that date?

Or how about the Pulse nightclub massacre on June 12^th?

Why do we celebrate for an entire exhaustive month? Simple: because there are no big holidays in June; Father’s Day isn’t big as Mother’s Day, and Graduation Day is quickly disappearing: keep the messaging simple and monolithic. That’s why June was chosen; the celebration is corporate, not cultural. October: Consume Candy. December: Consume Presents: June: Consume Rainbows. Ad nauseum.

I’m amazed there’s not more outcry about this. This community seems apathetic. That’s where consumerism wants us: in a state of apathetic consumption.

I’m a queer who participates in, and supports my local community. I engage with other individuals, and we form networks. Real cultural change happens organically – not because chain stores foist products on the populace in the name of my rights!

Let’s consider how the algorithms on social media affect the queer community.

Social media brings the world together – whether you like it or not! It bypasses social barriers, forcing something meant for me into the face of someone who doesn’t care for it. It crams cats and dogs into a small room, and orders them to get along; what happens next should be obvious.

Imagine a moderate, right-of-center voter, who’s suddenly confronted with an LGBTQ gender identity survey on their social media of choice. Why did it show up? Who knows? Maybe because five years ago they asked Google what “programmer socks” were, three years ago they bought a Madonna album, and last week they left a YELP review saying “Excellent Quiche”. Whatever the reason, the algorithm has now decided to thrust Pride Month into their face, even though they never asked for it.

So of course, they leave a nasty comment under said Facebook query, which only serves to increase the probability that they’ll see similar advertisements. So more such ads appear, the disinterested voter feels increasingly bombarded with pro-LGBTQ messages, and senses that their culture is being threatened. Facebook’s demand for incessant applause only exacerbates this (30 day ban for leaving a rude comment on a post you never wanted to see!).

In my perfect world disinterested parties wouldn’t hear about my rights. Why should they? The legal system supports my gender and sexuality rights now more than any other time; not everyone agrees with my lifestyle, but bombarding such folks messaging won’t make them sympathetic. In fact, it’s far more likely to create a backlash and drive them into homophobic/transphobic extremism.

Even if they succeed, the corporatist pseudo-pro-LGBTQ campaigns exist to sell product, not to address or advance issues that actually matter.

Dear Hasbro: the queer community didn’t support nongendered Potato Head. This issue is insipid. At best, it makes the queer community look frail, reactionary, unhinged, and fussy. At worst, it makes the queer community look sinister, plotting the end of binary gender as we come after your kids!

It was guerilla marketing at its most effective. Potato Head – a dead brand from the 1970s – was suddenly in the news once more. They made a killing. Let’s hope it doesn’t get any queers killed. Well played, Hasbro.

The Potato Head fiasco eclipsed the (albeit buggy) release of Cyberpunk 2077. In Cyberpunk, you can play as a customizable man, woman, or transsexual character. This could rightly be seen as inclusive for the LGBTQ community – but instead of discussing this, it was overshadowed by a gender-queer potato.

One need not be overtly pro-LGBTQ to bank off Pride, either. Remember the “Never Hide” campaign for Ray-Ban?

In 2007, the campaign featured its most iconic images of people doing risky things. One ad was of two men, apparently homosexual, primly dressed (vaguely Mad-Men like), walking and holding hands while onlookers glower. Wow! You go boys! So brave! So stunning!

But Ray-Ban didn’t contribute to LGBTQ charities. Nor were gay people ever prevented from wearing sunglasses. In fact, what are they trying to say by including homosexuality in the ‘dangerous situation’ aesthetic?

“I’m into extreme sports!”
“I was on Delta Team!”
“Oh yeah? I’ve got all of you beat. I like to have sex with men!”

I’m pretty sure this comes off as obnoxious, not brave.

When companies pull stunts like this, they get to enjoy the increased profits, while queer activists (who are largely pursuing legitimate issues, not Potato Representation) suffer the backlash. Despite the “Get woke, go broke!” meme, very seldom are there any repercussions for adopting the outfit of civil rights – not for the companies, anyway.

Rainbow-guerrilla marketing undermines the legitimacy of queer activists. It stirs up the crowd against people like me, even though I had nothing to do with it. And given the radical political polarization we’re seeing in America, I worry that these cynical ploys could see me deprived of my rights and well-being.

This is nothing less than corporate-sponsored social piracy.

Queers don’t need this. We aren’t idealists, we’re strategists. We fight to achieve objective ends, not symbolic victories (after all, what are we, the GOP?). But somehow the love-bombing from corporations during Pride Month has made us forget this.

Our community deserves better.

We don’t need corporate “support”. The queer community is thriving! LGBTQ folks are creative, innovative, and engaged with achievable political action. They craft communities seemingly overnight. During the past thirteen years, working as a queer artist, I’ve seen the vitality of this culture firsthand. I’ve met and collaborated with tremendous people. And not just self-employed creatives, but business owners as well!

We don’t need corporate sponsorship to thrive; and we certainly don’t need empty corporate gestures…

I’m not the first one to say this. There was once was an annual event called Gay Shame – remember my opening? – which flourished in London, Brooklyn, Stockholm, and San Francisco, between 1998 until around 2015. The organizers weren’t ashamed of being gay – no, they were mocking the consumerist trash that Gay Pride had become. They used guerrilla theater (something reminiscent of actual Pride events) and dark, wounding humor typical of modern Drag culture to lampoon their sellout cousins.

And while they were certainly reactionary in their impetus, they used these events as networking hubs for activism. Their tactics were local, their causes was global, and the result were flourishing communities.

I’ve never been to a Gay Shame event. I tried, but back then I was out of the loop. From what I can tell these events began to peter out six years ago, but I like to believe that it’s only on hiatus. Sometimes great art and great activism needs a break to restructure and re-imagine.

Maybe I’m too hopeful.

But if Gay Shame is over, does that mean it served no purpose? No, it proves there’s an alternative that can be more meaningful to the true needs of the LGBTQ community, while still keeping those needs anchored in achievable goals. Back then we made our own merch, DIY style. We can set up live theater and music, bazaars and markets, art installations, we brought out legislators and activists to speak about the needs of our community, and if one person asked for help in affording a permit, the community always found a way of raising the funds.

Or hey, forget the organized fundraising; how about the queers at Shame just show up to blow off steam and lampoon consumerism? I’d show up for that too.

Ultimately the reason I want to attend a Gay Shame event is because back in the day, queer folks stood up for themselves with direct action, with no corporate support. That’s the legacy of Stonewall: the community organized independently around the incident. Maybe they didn’t do so in the most effective way, maybe their goals weren’t always clear, but we did it without the permission of a multinational which runs on slave labour.

Nobody at Stonewall carried a sign reading “Sponsored by Absolut Vodka’. They had no permit endorsed by Citibank and Allies TM. They were just LGBTQ Americans exercising their first amendment right to peacefully (on the other five nights) assemble.

Are we so addicted to mass-produced swag that we can’t do what 200 angry queers did in a frenzy on a hot June night in 1969?

I don’t believe that for one second.

With a little more planning, and a little less pampering, we can still march – taller and stronger once we remove our corporately tethers.

I’m won’t be a hypocrite. I love good old fashioned Pride Swag, I own my share. I’ve kicked in a few bucks at independent costume shops and Etsy stores alike. Once in a while, I have a moment of weakness at Spencer’s or Hot Topic. I love going to glitzy, overproduced Pride Events, I’ve rarely missed a year. I fall victim to the urge – after all, who doesn’t love a party?

But I’d hang it all up for a chance to attend one radical, goal-directed, funny, sassy, guerrilla theater style Gay Shame. I’m not the only queer who feels this way. Even if I’m in the minority in the LGBTQ community, I’d still go. Who wouldn’t? Would the corporations protest us? Nobody walks out of their house bedecked in glitter and rainbows to fit in with the herd – so why are we allowing ourselves to be corralled?